I’ve been quite ill over the past few weeks, like really poorly. My mobility has gotten worse, yet again! I now can’t even walk around my house without help or a zimmer frame. I’ve had a hospital bed put in for me, a toilet lift, & as mingin’ as it is, I have a portable toilet put in my room.
Because things have been a bit tough, I’ve barely seen one of my friends, which is really upsetting. I feel like every ones moving forward and I’m just going backwards!
But on the plus side, I’ve realised that people’s opinion of me doesn’t matter, and if they want to stare at my hair, that’s their problem, not mine. So, this is me, like it or lump it!
Sooo excited that the Teenage Cancer Trust unit is being built in Nottingham! :-) It’s going to make the world of difference to be in an environment with people your age, & to be treated your age. I just wish it was there when I was treated as an inpatient, haha.
Just wanted to say I hope everything is getting a little better for you, and to keep staying strong you are an inspiration, you and your family should be very proud. xx
Awwww, thank you so much, it really means a lot :-) x
Aww, thank you x
As soon as I came home from London I went to have a nap. Whilst I was sleeping, a friend popped round with a card and present for me. When I woke up and my Mum told me, and I was like ‘awww’, I really can’t believe how nice people are! Anyway, I opened the card, and it was so, so lovely. Then I opened the present, and she’d brought me a butterfly Pandora charm. It joins together with hers and says ‘friends forever’ on it. It was such a surprise, and such an amazing one! What she has wrote and the thought behind it, just wow.
We haven’t been friends long, and wouldn’t have even of met if it wasn’t for this horrible illness. But I am so happy I did meet her, she’s so lovely and I’m really looking forward to getting to know her some more, and hopefully make a really good friendship.
There’s a few people I’ve become good friends with because of this awful thing, but now them people mean so much to me. We’ve got a really special bond that will never be broken! They support and understand me, and I’ll be forever grateful. Friends I already had try to understand, but often find it difficult. But they treat me how they always have, they haven’t started fussing or trying to watch what they say. I’ve just always been Hannah to them! I feel so awful for putting them in this situation. They’re soo good to me, cheering me up when I’m down, listening even if they don’t get what I’m saying, and just plain being there.
I don’t have many friends, but the ones I do have a are the best, and I love them all dearly :-)
for your post about your wish was it through the make a wish foundation; or was it something you just really wanted to do
It was all sorted through Rays of Sunshine, which is a wish granting charity for children and young adults up to 18 :-) They made my wish come true, and I’m very grateful x
You seem so strong and so confident with your cancer! I wish I found it in myself to be stronger through my battle with cancer (Hodgkin's Lymphoma). I was incredibly she about my disease and you really are an inspiration to any other teen going through the motions of cancer.
Aw, thank you m’dear. I’m not confident with it or strong, I just accept that this is how it is at the moment and it doesn’t matter how much I get upset over it, it won’t help. Saying that though, I still have a cry every once in a while! I try and pick positives out of what’s happened :-) When did you have your cancer? Have you finished treatment or..? Sorry, I just like it when I meet other teens affected. Hope to talk to you again m’dear :-) xx
No really, it was. I had a chauffeured white limo all day long, stayed in a posh hotel in Hyde Park, had my nails done for the first time ever, ate at Planet Hollywood, then went off to watch Matilda which was bloody fantastic and everyone needs to see it!!!! Seriously, I had such a good day, it was so special and I will remember it forever. We haven’t done much as a family this past year, and it was lovely to just get away, have a great day, and spend it together :-). Rays of Sunshine really did make my wish come true, and I’m so, so grateful! Hope to do some fundraising for them in the future, then they continue to make other ill children’s/teenagers wishes come true.
As far as the hospital bed in your room, I can understand not wanting that environment around you ALL the time...or at all if it can be helped. Just remember that they're there to help YOU, and if you don't feel comfortable with certain things, speak up for yourself. Their job revolves around you and your needs. It shouldn't hurt their feelings to hear your opinion. Good luck, beautiful! *Not intending for this to sound like instructions. Sorry if it comes off that way. *
They suggested it, and I said that I wanted to avoid that at all costs and they were really good at understanding why and what not :-). They’ve said there’s mattresses I can have or mattress covers to make me comfortable if I felt I did need something, so there’s other options before that. Thanks lovely, and not at all haha :-) xx
Now it’s time to chill out and have a lovely week off! Mummy’s taking me out tomorrow in my chair just so I can enjoy the sunshine. My Nan and Grandad are coming up for a week or so on Sunday, and it’s also one of my closest friends birthday, so am going out for a meal which will be lovely as I haven’t seen her and others that are going in a while. Tuesday and Wednesday I’m off to London for my wish (a West End show!). Then I’m going to attempt to make some plans to see people from then on, get some kind of social life back.
Overall, I really think this week is going to be brill! :-) I’m a very happy Hannah.
It is far, far too hot for my liking! I mean, my cancer makes me sweat, my chemo makes me sweat and now heat on top? I even had to go without my wig today as that would be another factor that makes me sweat. It’s utter poo, and I’m not a happy bunny about it. But on the plus side, I get to wear pretty skirts and start slapping out all the summer clothes I’ve bought :-)
Got the occupational therapists here as they’re going to see if there’s anything that will help me and make certain things easier. Obviously I’m thankful to them, and I do want help as some things take the piss, but I don’t want my house to be turned into a hospital environment. Like they want me to have a hospital bed and stuff! They’ve said we won’t give you anything that you’re not happy with, but idk, by saying no it feels like I’m saying, ‘no that won’t work, you’re not doing your job right and you’ve come here for nothing’. Ah well, we’ll see what they say and go from there..